Strong love is give and take.

When you have strong love in your relationship. You understand the balance of give and take. You know that for every thing you take you must replace an item into your relationship. For example if you need time to yourself you need to put that time back into your relationship later by doing something special for your partner. Say for example that your partner takes the kids out to play because you are feeling stressed with the noise in the house, later you need to repay this kindness to your partner with something they would truly enjoy. Maybe it could be a back rub or an intimate evening saying thank you. This balance is important in your relationship as well as your life. Keeping this balance will keep your relationship healthy and strong for your entire lifetime.

Being Selfish

Is there a time to be selfish in a relationship? Of coarse there is we all need to have and want our needs and desires met. However how do we accommodate this type of thinking when we want to attend to our partners needs also? Well it is a give and take process you have to feel when it is all right for you take and know when it is time for you to give. How in the heck do you know when those times are? Believe me you will know your body will tell you when you need things and your mind won't let you forget about them. As for you partner all you have to do is love them and you will feel their needs and desires also. It is not an exact science but neither is life itself. The learning process goes on for ever and understanding that you will constantly be given new and fresh challenges in your relationship is a calming notion that when you come to grips with all things sort of fall into place. So be a little selfish when it is your turn and be ready to let your partner be selfish at time just make sure it is a 50-50 split to get the best results.

Like the old song "You can always get what you wanted, but you get what you need"

In a romantic relationship you have to be able to give and take. Sometimes it doesn't work out in your favor. That is when you have to step back and look at what you really need in a relationship. Pick and choose the things that are important to you and communicate that with your partner. Once they understand the way your desires and wants work you might find it a little easier to give up those things that don't mean that much to you. Say for instance, shopping with the girls, or poker night with the guys, which are all great activities but when you get into a relationship you might not be able to do them as much as you like. Like the Rolling Stones sang "You can't always get what you want, but you get what you need" So take stock in the things you need and understand the things you want will be there when they can be.

Give and Take!

Everyone knows that romance is a give and take situation. The problems come in when the balance begins to get lopsided. One partner is doing more giving and the other is doing more taking. We all want to enjoy the romantic efforts of our partner it feels great. However, there are wonderful feelings in doing things for them as well. Think about how you feel when your partner does something romantic for you? Shouldn't they get the same feeling returned to them? If this is not your train of thought then you need to start retraining yourself. Unmatched romance soon becomes a chore to the person being romantic. They will start to loose interest and start thinking things like "Why, should I do this it won't be appreciated?" Think about how your react to your partner do you expect them to be the one that buys flowers all the time, or sets up wonderful evenings for the two of you. If your not pulling your weight in your relationship then it is your partner that is suffering not you. Now if you love your partner and want them to be happy there is no time like the present to take action. Return all their romantic notions with ones of your own. Make it a challenge to yourself to return every serve they make and soon you might just find the wonderful joy you will have in yourself and how thankful you are that your partner loves you.

Being sexual without having sex.

I have heard it way to many times from couples. One partner is never in the mood as much as the other. With this problem we have to look a little deeper into our sexual being. You have to broaden your horizon on what constitutes sex. The partner that is desiring sex, shouldn't be left out in the cold just because the other partner doesn't have any desire on this day. The two of you need to work out some arrangements to meet both partners needs without either one of them feeling neglected or forced into anything. There are several forms of sex that one can perform on another without the actual sex happening between the two. Oral sex, hand jobs, and several other ways to get the person that desires the sex off is a great alternative. Masturbation is another get way to share without both of you having to participate fully. Let the partner who is urning for sex masturbate while the other partner watches and touches them. Make comments how how sexy it is and encourage them to talk also. The partner that is not in the mood might just change their mind as the event of masturbation is occurring. The in this point is to respect the other persons right to their feelings. Just because you are not in the mood doesn't mean that they have to not be in the mood also. With a little give and take you will soon find a happy place that makes both of you feel like your relationship is sexy and strong.

Be Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving! Today of all days is a perfect day to be thankful for all the good things in your life, especially your partner. Make sure today to make them feel special, put a little more love into your kisses. If you don't on a regular basis (which you should) make them see how important they are to you. Be considerate, ask to help them out, pick out a movie they want to see for later in the evening, to show them your feelings. Don't skip the little things, like take their plate to the kitchen for them, ask them if they would like a drink and then go get it, or even let them take a nap if they desire. So much can be said for these little considerate things. On this great day of family dinners, football, and parades make sure to be thankful for the things that are really important on this day. Have a great day and appreciate the people around you as you watch the turkey getting carved.

Keep the Peace!

I understand some of you are in a new relationship and that maybe you haven't had any disagreements, yet! Well they are coming let me tell you. If you think that you will not have an argument at any time then you live in la la land and need to get help. Actually disagreements or fights are good for a relationship, after they are over you realize that you can disagree and still love each other. This is where a lot of people get confused. They think that because their partner doesn't agree with them they are doomed. Think about it this way do you stop being friends with your best friend because they like a different sports team then you? or they don't order the same meal as you? Differences are great in a relationship so embrace them and know that is what helps you keep your identity in the relationship.

When you do have that big blow up you need to know when it is time to let it go. Things can get heavy and I have seen couples not speak to each other for days. This is the silliest thing I have ever seen. A relationship can overcome a lot but you have to know when it is time to give up on standing your ground. Think about is your view more important then your relationship. Realize it is okay to have different opinions. Compromise if neither one of you can be swayed, it's not hard people, you just have to give a little. If you partner is important to you that shouldn't be that hard to do.

Keeping the Peace is a challenge sometimes, I will not kid you. It is however worth the struggles and effort to not let little differences keep your relationship from being it's best. Know that it is okay to fight all couples do it from time to time but just know when it is time to lay down the guns and hug each other.

Give in a little.

We all love to get our way, however sometimes it is more romantic to give in a little. Now I am not talking about letting someone run over you. I am talking about a simple surrender to make your partner feel special. Maybe it is letting them have the pick of which movie you watch tonight, even though you know the one they will pick will just make you vomit. Maybe you can't decide on which restaurant to eat at. You can suck it up and go with their choice. Giving in a little is great for you relationship, it shows you are committed to working thinks out. You can use this in many ways and you can use it in the bedroom also. Maybe your partner wants you to try a different position, what the heck let it go and give it a try. If it doesn't work at least you can get it out of their mind. Relationships are tricky and sometimes you can't get everything you want. So give in a little and hopefully your partner will return the favor and give in to you, at times.

Figure out Likes and Dislikes

One thing that is very important to a relationship, is getting to know each other. Start today, if you haven't already, a mental list of your partners likes and dislikes. When you got to a restaurant pay attention to what type of entree they order. Is it chicken, beef, pork, or vegetarian. Knowing their preference scores big points in the romance department. This doesn't just apply to food. Get to know their likes and dislikes in everything. Which team is their favorite, what type of alcohol do they like, what brand of clothes do they prefer, the list goes on and on. Now the only thing you need to understand is these preferences can change over time. For example, you partner might enjoy beef at one point in their life, then switch to being a vegetarian during another point. If you serve them beef after they become a vegetarian you might get a raised eyebrow.

One word of caution, if you have something you really enjoy don't assume that they will enjoy it as much as you.  You cannot make someone have the same passion for what you enjoy.  For example I enjoy going to baseball games and while my wife enjoys it also she doesn't have the same passion for it I do.  She will tolerate it but doesn't have to be there.  She could find many other things she would enjoy doing herself.  Once you figure out some of you partners likes and dislikes you now are faced with the challenge of making sure you both get to enjoy things you like.  As long as you share these feelings you will have no problems.  Just like anything in a relationship it is give and take.  I like to say it is sharing, that sounds a lot better.

Special Thanks to MarkPritchard for the photo from creative commons flickr