Communication, Communication, Communication

We hear it so often that communication is the key to relationship bliss.  However there are many ways to communicate that we didn't have just a few years ago.  Texting, email, Skype and the list goes on and on.  However, we don't want to forget about actually talking.  Make sure to take the time to talk to your partner it will help in many ways.  

Here is an amazing way to get the conversation rolling.

This great book gives you 1000 questions to get the conversations started.

Click Below to pick up the book and get your communication back up to standard.  

Click Here!

Rap Session

How often do you just sit down to talk about things between the two of you? Do you make time for this type of activity? A rap session isn't about beat boxing or reciting the latest SnoopDog song it is about both of you getting a chance to just talk about things effecting you. It might be the news or your work, or even the latest movie that you have just seen. The point is the rap session is where you just let your feelings out and both of you get a chance to listen and speak to your partner. Pick a time when you will be alone, after the children are in bed and you have time to yourselves. Get a glass of wine, turn the television off, and just speak what is one your mind. Take turns so it isn't just a one sided speech. When it is your turn to listen then you do just that and really listen to what your partner is saying. Let your emotions come out laugh, cry, or celebrate but make sure you are honest not only to your partner but to yourself also. These rap sessions are great ways to build your relationship and make it stronger then it has ever been.

Trust

One of the most important things in a relationship is trust, everyone has heard this a million billion times. Not only is trust an important for finding someone to love but it is also important later in your relationship. Keeping a friendship in your relationship is a thing most people don't feel is that important. When you have trust in your partner you also view them as a friend telling them things that you would only tell a friend. This way the two of you can laugh and joke around together, which is a staple of any long term relationship. The days of co-habiting are numbered as people are starting to realize that life is way to short to be unhappy. Trust is also important in your sexual relationship. As your relationship grows you may want to try some different things in the area of sex. If you trust your partner you will have no problem telling them of the desires and fantasies that you have. This will create new dynamics in your sex life and in turn build an even stronger relationship between the two of you. Trust also comes into play as you get older and need that rock to stabilize you. You might need someone to take care of your and a trust worthy partner is the best at this. Life is not easy but with the trust of your partner it is definitely more fun and exciting.

Make dinner, conversation time.

When we go out to eat or even eat a home for that matter, we are setting up a great time to discuss and learn about each other. Even if you have been married or dating for years there is always something you can learn from great conversation. Find topics that you can discuss that will have both of your offering your opinions. Don't be only a listener, engage in the conversation and get your ideas heard. Find out about things going on in your partners life they you might not hear about other wise. Things like work, or happenings in their life that you are not apart of. Make it a game and ask questions of each other, take turns and make the other person answer each of your questions. A good night of conversation is actually foreplay and with your minds stimulated your bodies are soon to follow.

Great Listening tool!

We have talked and will continue to talk about ways to improve your ability to converse with your partner. Communication is and always will be the foundation of your relationship. With that in mind I came across a method of communication that improves your listening skills. The IMAGO method of conversing is a great way to really hear what your partner is saying, and it is totally simple. What you do is basically repeat what your partner is saying when they want to speak to you about an issue they are having in your relationship. Simply put you quietly listen to what your partner has to say and then you repeat it. You don't comment on it or interrupt while they are talking you just listen and repeat. Sounds to simple to work doesn't it. I suggest you try it sometime it truly is an amazing way to hear and understand the message. Have you partner make sure you repeat the message exactly as they did so you get the full effect. Number one with you speaking this concern you hear it in a different manner and it registers better in your head and by not addressing or speaking on the issue it gives you time to think about what they and you are saying. For more on this topic click on the title of this post and learn in more detail how the IMAGO method can help your relationship. You can also pick up the book "Getting the love you want" or "Getting the sex you want" for a more detailed instruction on the subject.

Festival Time

It's that time of year where festivals are all over the place. This is a great romantic weekend get away that give you time to see some neat things yet allows you to walk and talk the day away. Get up early drive to your festival and enjoy the day. Browsing through the booths and partaking of the local food and flavors it not only romantic, but can also save you big money. Finding treasures or something special to mark your relationship is a great thing to look for. You can spend a little or a lot depending on your mood but the air is clean you can walk hand in hand and enjoy each other company while you weave in and our of the festival.

A Date at the Zoo?

Looking for somewhere to take a date when you are first starting to date. Out to dinner is nice but a little to rigid, clubs are great if you don't want to hear what each other is saying. Here is a great idea that might just show a little of your sensitive side. Take your date to the zoo. The zoo has lots of things to look at and the atmosphere is relaxed. You can take your time and wander around giving both of your plenty of time to talk. You also get to see if your date is comfortable around children and crowds. The zoo is also a great help in starting conversations as their are several animals to talk about and give you opinion on. Find out what each others favorite animal is and if the date goes well you could send your date a little stuffed animal of their favorite for a little added romance. Pick a day when the kids are at school so the crowds might be a little smaller and plan on spending the day there, no rush just walking and talking and viewing. In my opinion this is one of the less stressful dates you can go on.

Communication 101

Communication 101 We all hear that communication is one of the most important things in a relationship. I don't think anyone can debate that. However, what if you are not the best talker or you have to think your feelings out before you say them? You partner thinks you are just being silent. Yet, you are trying not to say the wrong thing. If one partner is used to speaking his/her mind, it is hard for the other to get his/her feelings out. Most often what happens is the easy speaking partner will jump into the conversation before the less assertive partner finishes his/her thought.

To communicate when this is the problem takes effort on both of the people in the relationship. The more timid speaker of the two has to get his/her courage up and his/her in order before speaking, and the more assertive speaker has to back off a little and let the other partner speak at his/her own speed. Still, even at best there will still be some communication problems. Some things I might suggest to help with communication are as follows. First, try sitting back to back when you need to have a heated discussion. Sit with your backs touching, this at least gives both of you some comfort as touch is another important part of a relationship. Some people will be able to speak more from the heart when not having someone staring at him/her waiting for a reply. If sitting back to back doesn't work, you might try to write your conversation out or since we live in modern times text each other or instant message each other from another room. Something about conversing over the Internet gives people freedom from their fears of speaking. But, also be cautious of texting or emailing as one’s tone cannot be understood via written words.

If neither one of these ideas work, you can as a last resort try a mediator. If you have a close mutual friend you feel comfortable with, let him/her sit in on your communication or you can even get a counselor that can referee your conversations. I only suggest counseling if you issues are threatening your relationship. In closing, remember that words can hurt just as much as physical pain – often times more. If you never have kind words to express to your partner, he/she will feel less of a person and it could spin your relationship towards trouble.

If you need more help or assistance finding communication help, get online and do some searching. I really like a gentleman that goes by the title "The Tower of Power". Joshua Uebergang is his real name, and you can find his web site at http://www.towerofpower.com.au/.

Image from flickr and Indrasensi