Showing posts with label issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label issues. Show all posts

Monday, January 25, 2010

Do the little things to help improve your relationship


There are many things you can do to improve your relationship and most of them do not involve major changes in your life. It is sometimes the small things we do that make our romance improve. Things like not flushing the toliet when our partner is in the shower, helping with the chores that are not yours, fixing dinner, or even a gentle back rub while watching television. These simple little things can go a long way to improving your relationship. If you listen to people that are having relationship troubles you will see that most the time they will pick out these little things to show how their relationship has changed. Things like she/he doesn't hold my hand any more, or he/she doesn't shave on nights we are going to be together. When we stop attending to the little things soon we will have larger problems in our relationship. Now if you want to keep your relationship strong and health start with the little things and work your way up to major topics. Most likely they will be gone by the time you attend to the little things.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Feeling comfortable


Feeling comfortable in a relationship is one of the most under rated feelings that people miss out on. We go into relationship trying to be the perfect person and making the person we are trying to attract think that we don't have any flaws. In doing this we set ourself up to not be as comfortable in the beginning as we would like to be. We live under these false pretenses believing that we can keep it up the through out the relationship. Finally as some point you have to break down and show that you are not this perfect person that you have been trying to convince your partner you are. When you feel comfortable in your relationship this isn't hard, you have open communication and it is easy to express your feelings and admit your problems. On the other hand if you are uncomfortable with the communication admitting these issues is a bit more hard. My suggestion to anyone getting into a relationship is to be as close to yourself as you can and make sure the person you are trying to attract likes the real you. You don't what them to find out down the road of issues that might make your relationship tense. Relax as you go out on those first few dates and show your new flame how you really are, not only will they appreciate it but you can rest assured that you won't have to live behind a mask.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Great Listening tool!


We have talked and will continue to talk about ways to improve your ability to converse with your partner. Communication is and always will be the foundation of your relationship. With that in mind I came across a method of communication that improves your listening skills. The IMAGO method of conversing is a great way to really hear what your partner is saying, and it is totally simple. What you do is basically repeat what your partner is saying when they want to speak to you about an issue they are having in your relationship. Simply put you quietly listen to what your partner has to say and then you repeat it. You don't comment on it or interrupt while they are talking you just listen and repeat. Sounds to simple to work doesn't it. I suggest you try it sometime it truly is an amazing way to hear and understand the message. Have you partner make sure you repeat the message exactly as they did so you get the full effect. Number one with you speaking this concern you hear it in a different manner and it registers better in your head and by not addressing or speaking on the issue it gives you time to think about what they and you are saying. For more on this topic click on the title of this post and learn in more detail how the IMAGO method can help your relationship. You can also pick up the book "Getting the love you want" or "Getting the sex you want" for a more detailed instruction on the subject.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Romance is open minded.


If there is one thing that I know for a fact, it is that romance is open minded. Romance has to stay open and new at all times. You can only give flowers so many time and if you got flowers everyday you would likely get sick of getting them. So, to keep romance fresh and new you have to continually open to new and exciting ways to romance your mate. Sure there are things that you might not be comfortable with and you can choose to stay away from those things. However when you want to branch out and find something new way to be romantic you have to get out of your comfort zone a little. For instance if you always go to a Italian restaurant when you go out to eat deciding to go to a Thai restaurant would make you a little uncomfortable. Same can be said for more intimate activities, so many people are against anal play but some people really enjoy the thrill of it. The most important part is not to judge anything your partner might want to try be open and keep the communication flowing before and after the event. If you have stomach problems then Thai might not agree with you but you will not know for sure until you try it. Same for sexual issues, unless you try it then you don't know for sure that it does feel good. However if you are totally against something you should speak up and express that to your mate. If you go into it with a closed mind you will not be comfortable and not give it a fair chance. So sometimes you have to put these types of things on the back burner or find alternatives. For instance if you are against swinging and your partner wants to try it maybe purchasing some wigs or fake mustaches will help them get into their romance while not crossing your boundaries. Again it all goes back to communication, some of the off the wall things that I have tried it took me a while to work up asking for but when I did I was amazed at how well they were received. Romance and love are wonderful things but you can't expect them to stay fresh and exciting on their own, you have to put the effort and communication into them.