Speaking Kind Words the book everyone needs

Click on picture to get the book.

Speaking Kind Words, Improving your relationship with heart felt words, should be on every shelf in every house that has lovers in it.  So often we get stuck saying the same old things to our lover.  This makes them become numb they no longer pack their punch.  When you start to expect your lover to say, "I Love You" every time they walk out the door it isn't as powerful.  However, if they change it up from time to time and say something like, "Can't wait to get back home and in your arms" or "Hold that Kiss I will be back to get it later"  You might just get a tingle in your body.  Click on the picture of the book above to see how you can get your copy of Speaking Kind Words.

Candle Light Dinner

Candlelight dinner will be perfect to celebrate any occasions dealing with romantic and love relationship. Even, a candlelight dinner can help you rebuild intimacy with you spouse. To have this romantic atmosphere, you do not need to look for luxurious restaurant since we will help you make this special moment in your own home with the following tips.

We can say that it is quite easy to give your spouse a candlelight dinner as you can find the materials around your house. First thing you need to prepare is the dining table. Pick out a set of tablecloth you have. The set usually consists of the tablecloth and napkins. However, if you do not have one, we suggest that you take a linen cloth to cover the dining table. Then you can look for some napkins with the same color scheme to fit the tablecloth. You can choose white as it is neutral to match any colors and gives classic accents. Another option, red can give warmness and add more romantic sense.

*Want an even different way to change the mood?  Try Sexy Challenges' Moods - pick it up today!

Now you can prepare some set of dinnerware. Also, provide water and wine glasses and arrange then at each place for both of you. Then, do not forget to place separate bowl with forks for salad. Make sure that you have set a formal dinner for you beloved one. Formal atmosphere can give more romantic mood.

Now we go on to consider lighting. It is as important as the previous elements to set a romantic dinner. You can either turn off the overhead lamps or simply dim them to make sure the candlelight becomes the center of lighting. Take some candlesticks. It is suggested that you pick out those made of crystal, glass or silver. White or red candles will be preferable. To add more light you can place some additional candles around the room.

Then consider flowers with vase. Though ordinary, roses will be perfect to set out romantic feeling. Place them around the candlesticks. Do not let the flowers choke the space on the table since you need to have eye contact and conversation before having dinner. Last but not least, music is another significant element to create romantic mood. Arrange your stereo system to play your spouse's favorite love song.

Discussing lighting, you are probably looking for some light fixture for your home. We suggest that you consider dimmable fluorescent bulb. Or, if you need fluorescent magnifying lamp you can find the info discussing the lamp in our article in another page.

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Sacred Intimacy Opens the Gateway

Nearly everyone does it, has done it, or will do it. It is the single most important thing in continuing human life. It can create new life. It can be an amazing and beautiful experience. It can honor the participants and the Divine. It can bond two people for life. It can help one lift the veil between one dimension and another. It can kill. It can be violent and abusive. It can cause severely deep emotional and psychological wounds. It has been considered a precious and sacred gift. It has been considered abominable and evil. What could be considered all of these things? What could be such a paradox?

Sex. Call it whatever you like: lovemaking, intercourse, coitus, copulation, reproduction, relations, intimate encounter, fornication, joining, sleeping together, nooky, union, etc. Mind you, the words one chooses to talk about it will give some insight into his or her feelings about this often taboo, yet sacred, topic. When one has a negative attitude or set of beliefs surrounding sex and intimacy, it will be much more challenging for that person to intentionally open to transcendental sexual experiences. Believing sex is dirty, sinful and should be done quickly to get it over with makes it far more difficult for that person to come to the understanding that sex is actually divinely sacred and can help him/her experience the Divine presence, the Higher Self, and Spirit while in human form.

First, a person must come to understand and know his/her authentic self and be willing to share this authenticity with another person in a committed relationship. It is true that many believe that sacred sex, sex magic, and transcendent sex may be achieved and experienced in relationships that are not filled with love and commitment. Yet, having sacred intimacy and sacred sex in a committed relationship can transform the individuals' lives and their life as a couple - their blended spirit. Therefore, it is vital for each partner in the relationship to willingly become vulnerable and learn who he/she truly is. Only then can the couple experience true sacred intimacy.

Yet, reclaiming one's true self and being authentic with one's partner is not necessarily a breeze to accomplish nor is it the only thing that matters in achieving sacred intimacy. Depending on what belief systems have been created throughout one's life by labels, comments, and teachings of one's parents, society, culture, teachers, ministers, peers, and personal experiences a person may have very negative belief patterns deeply ingrained about sex, sexuality, spirituality and religion. Discovering that he/she is not alone in his/her thoughts or feelings may be challenging to learn due to the taboos on this subject.

Moving this forward further past the taboos a person will need to learn and come to accept that sex is energy just as everything is energy. Sex is not simply a physical act that brings physical pleasure. Sacred sex can have magical results and deepen an individual's and a couple's spiritual growth. The metaphysical aspects to sacred intimacy and the profound impact it has on individuals, couples, their blended spirits, and the WHOLE of the Universe is beyond our full human understanding, but with an open heart and an open mind we can touch our Souls and open the gateway to Spirit through sacred sexual experiences.

Janelle Alex, M.Msc. is co-founder of Inward Oasis, http://www.inwardoasis.com, with her husband, Rob Alex. She is an International Media Host and offers Relationship Coaching, Sacred Sexual Coaching, Spiritual Coaching, and Dream Exploration. She holds degrees in psychology as well metaphysics. She is also certified in Reiki. Ms. Alex believes that a committed relationship can have a deep spiritual connection. She, along with her husband, help couples expand upon their relationship by accessing their combined energy and their spirituality as a couple as well as individuals.

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"On the rough seas of life, your relationship can be your life raft."

-Rob Alex-

Relationship Stress

There can be nothing worse than Relationship Stress

If you are in any relationship, you can be sure that you suffer from some kind of relationship stress. A relationship is defined by your connection to someone or something. You can have a relationship with another person, like your spouse or your boss, or you can have a relationship with an inanimate object, like your car or the TV remote. Any time you are interacting with someone or something, you are having a relationship. This is where the difficulties arise, because you see the world from your own unique perspective, which is, by definition, different to the way others see it.

How to deal with relationship stress

We all struggle to come to terms with the world and the millions of other people in it. Whenever you expect the other person to operate as you do, there will be some sort of relationship stress. The best way to approach this problem is to try to see things from a different perspective. In other words, look at things through the eyes of the other person. If your boss is snappy and bad-tempered, try to understand the pressure he may be under and don't always assume you know what is going on his mind. The trick is to take the emotion out of the situation, take a deep breath, and be calm and objective. If you have made a mistake, admit it, apologize and try to rectify the problem. It is amazing how the two little words, I'm sorry, can defuse and mollify anger. Being defensive and unyielding only tends to aggravate relationship stress.

Work on your self-esteem

When you are feeling tired and insecure it is easy to misinterpret things and then relationships become a minefield of hurt feelings and misunderstandings. When you are feeling confident, however, it is much easier to take things in your stride. It makes sense then, to avoid relationship stress, to work on your relationship with yourself first. Watch how you speak to yourself and try to be kind. If you genuinely love and accept yourself, you will automatically be more loving and forgiving of others. It would be wise to accept that no one is perfect and that includes you. So cut yourself a little slack every now and then and don't expect perfection. People who are very demanding are generally just as hard on themselves as they are on the people around them. You can be sure that a critical man criticizes himself just as much as he criticizes anybody else and often people like this see attack as the best form of defense. We are all wounded in some way emotionally and often give out the wrong signals to protect our vulnerability.

People who are hurt, hurt other people

If you can remember this, the next time someone is hurtful towards you, you can turn the situation around and reduce the relationship stress that could arise. Instead of lashing out and hurting back, you can be compassionate. Instead of taking it as a personal affront, you can see it as a cry for help from a wounded soul.

Looking after yourself

Stress in any form, be it relationship stress or work stress or financial stress, is so much harder to cope with when you are neglectful of yourself. Sleep deprivation, being unfit and eating junk food will all add unnecessarily to any burden. We all know that lack of sleep makes us crabby and hard to get along with. It also makes us more susceptible to disease. If you find yourself waging war with everyone around you, take a step back and ask yourself what you may be doing to contribute to the state of affairs. Exercise is a wonderful way to relieve tension and relationship stress, even if it is as simple as taking a walk. The world looks like a different place when you can step back. You may want to consider meditation too. It doesn't have to be complicated or difficult. Just taking the time to still your mind and be quiet is all that it really required. It comes back to that all important relationship that you have with yourself. You cannot change anybody else, no matter how hard you try, you can only change yourself.

Communication

In any relationship a lack of communication can get you into trouble, but no more so than between men and women. Husbands and wives often fight, not because they are bad people, but simply because they don't understand each other. They interpret events in completely different ways. You cannot assume that because you think a certain way, everyone else thinks the same way too. Tolerance for another point of view, as well as tolerance for the priorities of others, is an important factor in any relationship stress. However, if you don't communicate about this, you won't get very far. Listening is a vital skill to develop if you want to alleviate relationship stress. We are all so busy sometimes trying to get our own point across that we forget to listen to what the other person is trying to say. Everybody needs to be heard. Everybody needs to be validated and to have their feelings respected. If you can do those things for someone else they will be in a better position to do them for you. So always remember the following points:

• Respect for each other
• Listen to each other
• Talk a lot and about everything
• Show your affection
• Explain yourself when unclear

Wrapping it up

No relationship is going to be plain sailing, no matter how good it is. You can expect at least a few hitches along the way. The most important thing to remember though is that the most important person in any relationship is you, and the most important relationship you can ever have is with yourself. If you do not love yourself, how can you expect anybody else to? You have the power to change only one person, and that is you. You have all the tools within you to do that and if you can be a better friend to yourself, you can make relationship stress a thing of the past.

Author - Dave Massey of Symptoms of Stress.com which lots more ideas on Relationship Stress.

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Laughter, why we need it in our life

Everyone knows that laughter makes you feel good, but few are familiar with the large number of other things in your life that it helps. We know that a good laugh puts us in a good mood and eases any problems we may have, but it does much more than this. It has even been shown to be helpful in curing several diseases.

Laughter isn't usually thought of as something that is healthy, or something that improves your health, but as we will see in this article, it is. And as an added bonus, it's fun, and it's free. As a result, its importance has begun to be realized more and more in recent years. There is now a yoga laughter movement that combines laughter with yoga, and it has many followers. Furthermore, there are many different laughter groups, and finally, there's even a day that is now devoted to laughter; "Laughter day" is the first Sunday of May, and it's celebrated around the world.

What are some of the benefits of laughter? A list of several is as follows:

1. Reduces Pain

The well-known author, Norman Cousins, suffered so much pain from inflammatory arthritis that he found it difficult to sleep. He finally decided to use laughter to see if it would help, and in his book "Anatomy of an Illness as Perceived by the Patient," he describes how he used old Marx brothers movies to overcome his pain. Laughter therapy is, in fact, now used extensively. A study in 1996 showed that patients who underwent surgery required fewer pain pills if they watched funny movies. Indeed, several studies have now shown that it significantly improves the quality of life for people in pain.

2. Reduces Stress

Our life is full of stress, most of which comes from the fast pace of today's society, and the pressure most of us feel as we try to get ahead. Stress comes from work, but it also comes from many other things such as marriage problems, money problems, and illness, and it's important to control it before it leads to anxiety and depression. Numerous studies have shown that stress is reduced when you laugh. In fact, it's virtually impossible to feel tense and depressed when you're laughing.

3. Improves Your Heart Health

Your heart is one of the greatest benefactors of laughter, and studies at the University of Seattle and other places have proven that the effects are bountiful. Laughter makes the blood vessels throughout your body function better by relaxing and dilating them. As a result, blood flows through your body much better, and the effect is not short-lived. A good laugh can increase the supply up to 24 hours. Michael Miller, M.D., of the University of Maryland has shown that a good laughter session is as good for your arteries as aerobic exercise (but don't stop aerobic exercises just because you had a laugh today). Dr. Miller also stated that it has been shown to stop or decrease atherosclerosis, and it helps adjust coagulation of the blood and clotting.

4. Reduces Blood Sugar Levels

Japanese researchers have shown that laughter also reduces blood sugar levels, which should be good news for diabetics, and pre-diabetics. It also decreases the time for the glucose in your blood to be used by your cells.

5. Helps the Immune System

Laughter has also been shown to increase immune response. Increased stress is known to be associated with decreased immune system response, which is obviously harmful to your health. Laughter decreases stress, so in turn it increases your immune system response. Laughter can, for example, drop the bloods supply of the stress hormone, cortisol. And chronically elevated cortisol levels have been shown to weaken the immune system. Studies have also shown that laughter raises levels of infection-fighting anti-bodies in your body. So, in general, it improves your resistance to disease.

6. Relaxes the Whole Body

Relaxation is something you can easily feel, so I'm sure you've noticed that your body relaxes after you have had a hearty laugh. Indeed, it relaxes the muscles throughout your body, and the effect can remain for up to 45 minutes after a good laugh.

7. Triggers the Release of "Feel Good" Endorphins

Endorphins play an important role in your body, and since some give you a "high", or at least make you feel good, it's a good idea to release them whenever possible. It's well-known that the "runner's high" is due to the release of endorphins. Certain foods such as chocolate and chile peppers also release them. Acupuncture is also based on the release of endorphins. And they have been shown to be released by laughter. So, again, if you want to feel good, laugh.

8. Asthma and Respiratory Infections

Asthma now effects millions of people in the US and throughout the world. All you have to do is turn on your TV to see it's importance; ads on various drugs for asthma flood the screen day after day. Laughter certainly can't take the place of these drugs, and in fact, it has been shown to trigger asthma attacks, but Japanese researchers have shown that it can also have a long-term positive effect.

9. Improves Emotional and Mental Health

The benefits to emotional and mental health may be one of laughter's greater benefits. It's well-known that laughter binds people together; it strengthens the bonds between them. This is why it strengthens marriages, and is even an "attractant" between the sexes. It helps marriages in that it can, and frequently does, help couples get through the rough spots. Laughter inspires hope, which is something that is needed for good emotional health.

10.Helps Creative Work

Laughter and humor helps job performance of all types, but is particularly helpful for people involved in creative work. It helps creativity in that it helps you to stay focussed and to concentrate.

11. Boosts Energy

If you feel "run down: or tired and listless, try laughing. Numerous studies have shown that it helps.

12. Burns Calories

Studies at Vanderbilt University show that laughter also burns calories (10 to 15 minutes burns 50 calories) but don't try to use it in place of exercise and dieting.

So it's important to get as much laughter and humor in your life as possible. How do you do this? The following are a few of the best ways.

1. Spend Time with People Who are Fun and Delightful to be Around

You're always in better humor when you are around people who are fun to be with. They can be friends, relatives or your children. Laugh with them and enjoy their company. And be on the lookout to make friends with people who have a good sense of humor.

2. Bring Humor into the Conversation

When you're talking to somebody, smile and laugh as much as possible. Tell them something humorous that happened to you, and soon you'll find that they will do the same thing in return.

3. Laugh at Yourself

Don't worry about making a fool of yourself when you tell people about humorous things that happened to you. Lighten up and enjoy the moment. Also, laugh at funny situations. When you find yourself in a situation that may not seem funny at the time, wait for a while -- it may seem funny later.

It's important, however, not to laugh at people, laugh with them, and don't poke fun at people you both know. Poking fun at anyone is a good way to lose friends.

4. Smile a Lot

A smile soon leads to a chuckle, and a chuckle to a hearty laugh. So smile a lot. Think about the humorous things that have happened to you that day.

5. Use Humor to Repair Problems in Relationships

Disagreements, arguments, and resentments happen to everyone and frequently lead to broken relationships, hard feelings and so on. Use humor to repair them. In the middle of an argument, or when you see one coming on, say something humorous, it will quickly break the tension.

And if you just want a good laugh, look to places where you're likely to find it. In fact, try to incorporate as much humor into your life as possible using them. Some of the best places for finding humor are:

• Movies
• Television: Comical sitcoms
• Funny Books: Both novels and nonfiction books
• Reading and telling jokes
• Comedy clubs
• Animals and children

Barry Parker, Ph. D., is a professor emeritus (physics) at Idaho State University. He is the author of 25 books on science, health, writing, and music. His website is http://BarryParkerbooks.com and he has several blogs, one of them is at http://Barrysbuzz123.blogspot.com. He has done research in biophysics (mutations in the DNA molecule) and in relativity theory (Einstein's field theory), has a strong interest in health and fitness, self-improvement, and in music (particularly piano). He taught a writing class at ISU for several years. One of his recent books is "Feel Great Feel Alive."

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Quote on Foreplay

Foreplay starts in the morning, not a few minutes before intimacy.  Don't miss the opportunity to make foreplay last all day.

-Rob Alex-

Foreplay tips for men

Arousing Foreplay Techniques: Foreplay Ideas, Tips & Techniques to Blow Her Mind in Bed

Forget obsessing about the size of your manhood, knowing dozens of sex positions which would probably break your back or turning to aphrodisiacs so that you can please a woman in bed. Sure, all of these things are also important - but the most essential ingredient for you to become the best lover that you can be is by refining your arousing foreplay techniques.

Did you know that more than 90% of women fail to reach an orgasm, simply because their lovers do not take the time to prepare them before 'taking it in'? If all you can think about the minute that you tangle the sheets together with your significant other is getting to the main event - both you and her will be missing out a lot.

Learn How to Arouse Girls with these Foreplay Ideas & Positions

When you hear a woman complain that her engine is not getting revved up enough prior to the main event, that should be your clue that you need to brush up on your skills on the arousing foreplay techniques that you can apply when making love to a woman.

So how exactly are you going to achieve this feat? Practicing a lot of patience, being extra attuned to her needs and using the following foreplay ideas and positions should help you out:

1.Give Her A Good Head Start

The most important thing that you need to keep in mind when arousing your wife or girlfriend is this: most women need to have a good head start. This is because it takes a lot of stimulation for them to get properly aroused - and even more than that for her to be ready for intercourse.

Knowing how to arouse girls is all a matter of being a patient enough lover to pay attention to her needs. What you can do is tease her mind with extra sweetness or even downright dirty talk during the day, and indulging in some long-winded foreplay during the night. You can probably stay clothed as you tease and arouse her body to a point when she can't take it anymore - your patience will be well worth it.

2.Take Note Of These Heavy Foreplay Ideas and Positions

Women love having men go down on them, and your oral skills is something that you need to refine if you want to be a master when it comes to how to arouse girls. Revealing your dirtiest sexual fantasies is also an arousing foreplay technique that you can use, as well as using your hands, fingers, lips and tongue to build the sexual tension without getting ahead of yourself.

3.Pay close attention to her reactions.

A hitch in her breathing, a change of her skin color, the way that she moans or the way that her pupils dilate - all these are indications that you are doing something right, so continue with your arousing foreplay ideas and give her what she wants.

At the end of the day, learning how to arouse girls is all a matter of applying the best foreplay ideas and positions, as well as the techniques that you have learned over time!

If you want to get even more tips on how to arouse girls, get a hold of the Foreplay Ideas and positions from our book entitled " Arousing Foreplay Techniques: Foreplay Ideas, Tips and Techniques". It will teach you everything that you need to know about being the ultimate stud and blow your partner's mind in bed.

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Foot Massages

Find out the truth about foot massage benefits.

Foot massage has been used for thousands of years all over the world. Many medical practitioners worldwide will attest to foot massage benefits. Still others doubt there are any foot massage benefits. Who is right?

It's almost a natural process after a long day on your feet to take off your shoes and begin rubbing the soles of your feet. Rubbing your feet is something you'll do without even realizing what you're doing. It's a natural way to ease the pressure and aching of your feet.

There is one basic foot massage benefit that no person can dispute...it feels good. Often the most worked body part, they can become very tired and stressed. Massaging tired aching feet almost always relaxes and relieves the aches and pains.

There are some scientific facts that can prove specific levels of foot massage benefits. Any time massage occurs on any body parts the area receives increased blood circulation. The blood is the lifeline of every cell in our body. It carries nutrients to the cells and carries toxins and poisons away from the cells. It only makes sense that if blood flow increases to an area, then the area will be proportionately rejuvenated and cleansed. This is factual. Therefore, it only makes sense that there are foot massage benefits.

Another scientific study performed on heart surgery patients showed there was a significant decrease in levels of stress after a foot massage. Reducing stress levels can help the body in many ways, mentally and physically as well.

Foot massage benefits are best received when a professional massage therapist performs the massage. All too often, it's not possible to get this kind of massage on a regular basis. There is another way to receive foot massage benefits without visiting a professional therapist.

You can now get scientifically designed foot massage units for home use. These foot massage tools can give you a wonderfully relaxing and calming massage. Pains and tiredness can be greatly reduced.

The iSqueeze Calf and Foot Massager is one of your best options for foot massage equipment. You'll get the benefits of a professional quality foot and calf massage right at home. Invigorating disks squeeze and penetrate muscles, while soothes vibration improves circulation and energizes muscles. Pressure nodes stimulate the soles of the foot for total foot massage benefits.

One favorite is the Aqua-Jet Foot Massage Spa. This foot massage machine provides everything necessary for a complete and relaxing foot massage.

The precision heater maintains the water temperature at a comfortable 115 degrees. Two hydro-jets control airflow and speed while two massaging nodes massage specific points and the arches on the feet. A remote control allows you to sit back, relax, and enjoy this great foot massager.

If you've never experienced the benefits of a foot massage, you owe it to yourself to try it today.

For home foot massage equipment visit http://www.brookstone.com/store/thumbnail.asp?wid=17&cid=1702&sid=170202

Janet Smith, Freelance Copywriter

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Romantic Antics Quote

Naked, what a great place to be with your lover

-Rob Alex-